Mastocytosis is a sort of proliferation of the mast cells. I’ve got too many mast cells. Some of them are the wrong shape. And they don’t die off as they’re supposed to. And therefore they can congregate in different organs of the body. And by the, main organ is the skin. Which, which I’ve got. You can get mastocytosis which is only a skin problem. But that can often turn to systemic mastocytosis, where it affects other organs. And I’ve got the systemic form of it. So I do get problems with stomach cramps and occasional diarrhoea, that sort of thing. And another unpleasant effect of it is called flushing, where I come over really very very hot. it’s not the same as the hormonal heat. it’s a different sort of heat.

And who told you that mastocytosis was a major factor?

My consultant told me that. In fact he confirmed that to me a few weeks ago. I contacted him when this came and said, could he tell me whether it was the major factor or a contributory factor, my mastocytosis. And he told me it was the major factor and one that could be, well, it wouldn’t be looked for because it’s such a rare thing. And the other factor which is common to most people is the fact that I was post-menopausal. But the mastocytosis was the major factor.

But you see when I was diagnosed just, people just didn’t know about it and that was that. Doctors, don’t know about it now, consultants don’t know about it now. it’s, and it takes so many forms. You can’t have a, a mastocytosis consultant because it affect, can affect your, you know, your liver, your spleen, your, you know, with these anaphylactic attacks, you know, that sort of thing. And all other aspects of, of, it’s complicated. And some people have been found to have mastocytosis when they haven’t had the rash. So that’s, that was very difficult to, to diagnose.

And for how long have you had this rash?

Well, I had the rash for at least, at least five years before I was diagnosed when I was in hospital. Because blood tests revealed nothing and no one knew any better.

And how did you feel when they gave you the diagnosis of osteoporosis?

Well, I was too ill really to, to feel anything. But the pain, the pain, I can’t describe the pain to you with five fractures happening so soon. I just felt so full of pain all the time. I don’t know, I just, I felt devastated all the, even when I was in bed, you know, trying to recover from the fractures, I felt devastated. And at times, well, at one time I got very, very depressed. I didn’t tell my husband that, but he knew I was. I couldn’t think about anything. And I couldn’t listen to the radio or the television or anything. And he said, he removed the tablets from my side of the bed. I couldn’t sit out you see. But I wouldn’t have dreamt of doing anything like that. But I really did go through a bad time with depression. It was probably just a few weeks, I don’t know. I felt sort of everything was hopeless, you know. I think quite a few people with osteoporosis suffer from depression. But I’ve never suffered from it before or after. Because I’m a very positive person, and as soon as I knew there was something I could do to help myself, I did a lot of fund-raising for osteoporosis, jumble sales, writing begging letters and all, all sorts of, raising a lot of money. So I, I believe in being positive about everything.

But it was that period when you were in a lot of pain?

Yes, a, a lot of pain. You can’t, you can’t be positive then. And that was before I knew that, before I saw the consultant and knew there were the, all these things I could do to help myself to live a, a reasonable life again. I wasn’t going to die. Which, I know it sounds ridiculous,

I didn’t talk to anyone. When you feel really low, you don’t feel like talking to anyone. I didn’t feel like, I didn’t, I just felt empty and I couldn’t talk to anyone. I couldn’t even talk to my husband. So I didn’t, couldn’t do anything. In fact, you know, your mentioning it now sort of just brings it back. I just, I just felt hopeless and helpless. And perhaps this is why I feel so sorry for people who get depressed, because I’ve got an inkling of what it’s like. Although I’m sure some people must get it worse, a great deal worse than that. But, no, I couldn’t talk to anyone. No, you just feel everything’s hopeless.

And suddenly I realised that osteoporosis was treatable and that, and already I was feeling a lot better after having hydrotherapy and physiotherapy. And I then realised that it wasn’t so bad after all, that, you know, I had some, had some good life ahead of me. And I realised that when I came out of hospital and things started to improve really, well, almost dramatically once I started to walk again. And I went on holiday in our caravan and I was able to walk a bit and sort of enjoy life. And as time went on, it did take a little while because I had, remember I had five fractures, and as time went on I, I joined a local group and did all sorts of positive things. And so although it’s pretty awful at the time when you have your fractures, they do heal eventually. And if you’re lucky you don’t get too much pain in the future. And you can always do things to alleviate that. You know, take a couple of painkillers or, or just have a sit-down or even a lie-down for a little while. And so I think osteoporosis is, although it’s not very nice, it’s, it is controllable and you can eventually lead a, quite a normal life.

What are your feelings about the future?

Well, I feel quite all right about the future. Because now we’ve got so much awareness of osteoporosis and so many drugs available to help people, I think, you know, we’re very lucky indeed. And I think of, you know, when I was diagnosed, when there wasn’t anything. And now they know all the right things to do, you know, the exercise, the diet, everything, I think, I think the future is quite, quite good.

My shape was I think the worst thing because, you know, you, you just don’t want to look odd. And I didn’t want to look as if I’d let myself go and was eating too much and not, you know. I feel like having a notice saying, I, I’ve got osteoporosis. That’s why my shape is like this And once, I suppose it was only a few months after I’d been out of hospital, I was sitting in the park with my younger daughter and a woman next to me said, don’t forget I was in my late 50s, Oh, when is your baby due, my dear Oh, that’s when I realised I wasn’t wearing a very disguising sort of outfit. But it is bad, I know. But I laugh at it now and, you know, I don’t, I don’t worry about it at all. I’m lucky to be alive. I mean this is the point, isn’t it? I could have got something and died.

And the local group organises hydrotherapy classes at the hospital I attend. And until about a year ago I used to go once a week to those in the evening. We paid for it ourselves, you know, it wasn’t paid by the National Health Service. And hydrotherapy is absolutely wonderful. It just makes you feel good in the water. You can do things that you can’t do normally.

So you had one of the physiotherapists with you?

Yes, giving us the, the exercises to do. All of us do all sorts of things in the water, stretching, walking, doing everything you can think of. That’s, and I had a lot of that in the beginning when I was first diagnosed anyway.

They should know that people are so nervous and frightened of having another fracture that they, that they should treat them very carefully. And I notice that lots of medical people, even the people who do the scans, think you’re going to get up from the bed like this. When you’ve got osteoporosis you can’t. You have to roll over and do it in a sort of special way. And lots of them don’t realise that. I mean, you know, some say, Oh, you can get u and think you’re going to get up. So they’ve got to realise that you have to, to get up from a lying position in a very special way and that people with osteoporosis are very frightened of fracturing again. I’m always, I’m talking about in the beginning, but even now I wouldn’t dream of getting up s-, s-, just from lying prone like that. It has to always be that position, you know, to do it and do it very carefully. That, that people will be a lot slower, you know. You see I, I realise how, how painfully slow, I’m really careful even now when I sit down in places, because it’s sort of habit really as much as anything. And, and, as I say, that I think is the important thing, to find out how the patient can get up herself, his or herself and not try and, not try and help them to do anything. Let them do it in their own time. But that really is the most important thing I think. Because I was terribly frightened of fracturing again. That was my biggest fear for so long.

So patients should, could do without that pressure of

Yes, they do, they’ve got to do things in their own time. Especially, do stress that bit about getting up from the lying position, the lying-down position that they have to roll over and get up carefully. I, I could demonstrate it, but you know what I mean. I think I’m explaining it all right. But people, people don’t realise that. Nurses don’t. I’m surprised. You know, they, they think you can just get up and that’s it.

So I gradually got to accept the fact that a) I was never going to look the same again. My shape had changed so much. I’d lost 5 inches. And all that has to go somewhere, so I’ve got a very protruding abdomen. And my back isn’t too bad, but finding clothes to fit was just a nightmare. In fact when I came out of hospital I only had one drawstring skirt, a huge sort of thing, and one blouse. So my daughter went to a charity shop and quickly got me a loose top so that I could have a change of clothing. So I had to find ways and means of looking reasonable with my changed shape, which was, you know, pretty horrible. And so I started making quite a few of my clothes. I’m not a very good dressmaker, but [laugh] necessity and all that. And I started buying maternity clothes. All my trousers are maternity trousers. And so with a combination of maternity wear plus making my own clothes I began to feel, you know, I was looking reasonable again. But, and also, I don’t know, you may not want to hear this, but I also started to do some publicity things to raise awareness of osteoporosis.

And, as I say, as for my shape, I’ve come to terms with that and I wear as many things as I can to, to look attractive, as attractive as I can be I mean. Not to, I don’t want to be conspicuous for the wrong reasons. That’s, that’s, that would be awful, you know. But I mean sometimes I know it does show.

How do you feel about changes in your body shape?

Oh, I was very sad about it. And, but my husband was so supportive. But I felt so, so embarrassed with this awful protruding abdomen. And when I’m with my sister, she’s, she’s now tall, much taller than me. I used to be taller than her. And, and although people say things, Oh, I’ve got a, a tummy now I’m olde it’s not, not the same at all. And being, if I’d been short always like this it wouldn’t have mattered. But when you’re short and you’ve got a bad back it’s a strain, you know, lifting. I mustn’t clean windows or do a lot of stretching up because it really creates quite a lot of, of backache if I do that. it’s sort of restricted in lots of ways. Which is, is a shame really.