Andrew – Interview 38
Andrew has struggled with depression as well as chronic physical health problems for most of his life. His 13 years of marriage were a happier period, but after his wife’s sudden death from a heart attack, his mental and physical health deteriorated and he was diagnosed with depression. He has found attending a mental health peer support group to be very helpful, together with antidepressant medication and regular visits to his GP.
Andrew felt he was different from other children from an early age because he had dyslexia and because he and his younger sister had kidney problems. Growing up, Andrew recalls feeling alone, abandoned and that no-one was there for him, his father having died when he was nine, and his mother busy raising five children. When he was 14 the family relocated from the regional town they lived in to a capital city so he could receive dialysis. Each time he visited hospital he wondered if it might be his last time, as he knew of other dialysis patients who had died. Two years later he received a kidney transplant, as did his younger sister. Adjusting to life after the transplant was difficult, as Andrew had always felt he didn’t need to push himself to achieve things because he wasn’t sure how long he would live.
Despite lacking formal qualifications, Andrew found work but due to his self doubts always wondered if people employed him simply out of pity. He felt that there was no enjoyment to be had from life and couldn’t understand other people’s drive or passion as he felt he was just going through the motions. From 18 he started drinking heavily. However, when Andrew met his wife at age 26, things changed. His wife made him happy, he gave up alcohol, and grew in confidence. He worked full-time and was happy to also support his wife’s floristry business. However in 2001 when Andrew was 42 his wife passed away suddenly from a heart attack.
Immediately after his wife’s death Andrew was in shock. Gradually, his mental health deteriorated. He felt abandoned and alone, similar to when his father had died. Andrew had also developed muscle wasting in his extremities in his 30s and had continued health problems associated with his kidneys. He became very unwell due to these health conditions and his grief over his wife and in 2003 he was hospitalised twice. He saw a psychologist who diagnosed depression, suggested antidepressant medication and joining a mental health support group.
It took Andrew three months to muster up the courage to attend the group. However, when he did, he was positively surprised and found he preferred a group setting to one-on-one therapy with a psychologist. He found the members supportive, helpful and felt he could be honest about his mental health. On reflection Andrew thinks he had experienced the same lack of passion and feelings of disinterest which he now understands as depression from an early age. He has now been with his peer support group for seven years and has led his local branch for three years. Andrew says the group has also helped him develop social skills and be more assertive and confident. He says being determined to be independent and positive and continue work has been a great decision.
Andrew continues taking antidepressant medication. He thinks the support group has been most beneficial and has found his interactions with his GP comfortable and supportive. He believes that an important aspect of him getting better has been to develop a sound philosophy; and learning to cultivate positive thoughts;. He takes pleasure in the company and support of his sisters, his wife’s family, and friends. He hopes to continue to develop his talents and passions and meet a new partner to share these with.