The first couple of times I went back I was quite anxious and I suppose being in the same place, it just brings back all the memories of being there and how scared you were and I think you’re sort of quite relieved when you go home. I’ve just been actually, I go every year just after Christmas and I’ve just been and the more time goes on you know it becomes better, much better.

What happens at the check-up?

They just do a smear, ask if you’re feeling OK. I think I had a scan once. I’m just trying to think, I think I’ve had a scan once. And might sort of do an all over the body type check. But now because I suppose its five or six years they generally just ask me do I feel OK, have I got any problems, do I feel OK. And do a smear and that’s it and then I wait for the results.

He, I sat down, he started to carefully tippy-toe around the topic I think and he said that there were two, two types of cancer cells, one cancer cells with a line and pre-cancer cells and he said I was sort of around in the middle, he was trying to break the news in carefully I suppose. And I just said ‘Well have I got cancer or have I not got cancer, I don’t want this vagueness?’ To which he said ‘Yes, yes you have. And then said you know did I have children because I probably wasn’t going to have, probably I wasn’t going to be able to have any more and that I needed to have a hysterectomy.

And when he told you your diagnosis, what was, would have been the best way for you?

Well I suppose it’s a bit abrupt just to sit you down and say ‘Yes you’ve got cancer,’ but probably that way, rather than sort of making it sound something that it isn’t.

I think the earlier that you can catch it obviously the better and so if you have any worries and your doctor says ‘Oh no, you know, you’re basically a hypochondriac, don’t be so silly,’ then I think, I suppose I wish I had been much stronger in my own mind and thought, OK I don’t like what you’re telling me I shall go somewhere else. Instead I just thought well that’s the doctor and they’re telling me so I must listen to them because they must be right, which I’m sure in general they are. Well if you still feel that it isn’t right then maybe you should look elsewhere or get somebody else to check you out, just not put up with so much of being told everythings fine.

I think on about the third day I think I said ‘I must get up, I have got to wash my hair. And they said ‘No you can’t, you can’t. And I said ‘I am getting up and I want to wash my hair. So they did help me and I got up and I could wash my hair because by then I was a bit more with it but I was feeling lousy and I wanted to feel better so I made them get me up and wash my hair. Which is ridiculous, but. And then after that I think as the days progressed you sort of, I think the third, maybe the second day I was allowed, no maybe the third day, I think I was allowed a cup of tea and the only thing I ate, I don’t think I ate anything actually for about maybe five/six days. And as you became more with it you could actually get up and get out of bed and try and get dressed and walk around and do a little bit. And it, it wasn’t too bad. Actually waking up in the morning and because you’ve got a catheter you didn’t have to get out of bed and that was quite nice actually, I have to say.

I wouldn’t say its painful. Its just the most peculiar sensation because its obviously quite a long tube and they pull it out, its sort of, I think I had one in my sort of hip bone area and they were drains. And then they come in and say ‘OK today were going to take this drain out,’ and they will just press your stomach and pull it out and it would be like having a piece of spaghetti pulled out and you can feel it, wiggle, wiggle. I wouldn’t say it was painful I would say it was an unexpected sensation, that’s all.