It's kind of weird being eighteen and never having a serious relationship because, you know, you do think, “Is that normal? Is that not normal? Am I, where do I belong in this?” you know. Is it normal for a fat person to have already had a boyfriend? Is it, compare it to a thin person who’s always getting male attention and, yeah, you get jealous about people getting male attention all the time. People seem to be, you know, cause I do have, all my friends, my friends are a very attractive bunch to be quite honest but, you know, and they’re always, there's always some love interest going on or, you know, there's always something happening and then there’s kind of like me that just floats around and it’s like nothing.
You know, and you do feel a bit put out and you do kind of think, “Still left on a shelf.” I'm only eighteen and it still feels like that, you know. But it's a case of you have to, you have to realise and you have to understand that, you know, some blokes just aren't going to want to go out with you when you're this size. And it does hurt and you do kind of think, you know, that kind of sucks because you don't want to think it but you know it's true.
The only vague, very vague male attention I've had is from other overweight males because, you know, I'm not that much of a threat. I mean, that's another thing that I always think of is that girls are quite good friends with me because they know I'm not a threat to them, you know, in like a relationship sense. You know, like a lot of my friends are in couples and the girls never ever see me as a threat if I'm like joking around with their boyfriend and being, you know, just like really matey with them because they know that deep down their boyfriend isn’t want to go out with a fatty [laughs]. It sounds harsh but it's true, you know, and so...
Have they said that to you then?
No, they’ve never said it to me but you can, you just kind of sense it sometimes. You know, you can sense that, you know, I'm not a threat to them because I am bigger than them and their boyfriends aren't going to want to go out with someone who’s physically less attractive, I suppose you could say, you know. But it is a case of I'm there and I'm never seen as a relationship threat, you know. I'm never seen as someone that could ruin someone's relationship, you know, because I'm just not seen that way. And I think that, that is partially due to my size because they don't think that, you know, a fat person’s going to steal away their man, you know what I mean.