I was on the floor, on a bean bag, my daughter came up to me. Just couldn’t believe that I had a daughter. I really wanted a daughter and then I looked down and said, “I’m bleeding a bit much aren’t I?” And the midwife said, “No, no, you’re fine.” And I just looked at her and I said, “No, I’m definitely bleeding too much.” And she said, “Hm. I think you are.” She said, “Oh you mind if I give you that injection?” I said, “No, no, that’s fine.” So she gave me an injection.
And then I think she called another midwife in. I can’t really remember. Events got obviously a bit blurred. I handed [daughter] up to [husband] and I said, “You hold her, I just want to concentrate on this.” So he was, you know, holding her and getting to know her. The placenta came out followed by a load of blood but I just thought, I knew this is wrong.
So she called the other midwife and the midwife came in and they started to palpate my uterus. Which she had to start press down on it, I know now, to stop the bleeding. You kind of put fundal pressure on. And then they said to me, “Look you’re going to have to get up on the bed.” So I said, “Okay.” And I thought I can’t. And I said, “I can’t get on the bed, and they said, “You’re going to have to.” And I said, “I can’t get up.” And they said, “You’re going to have to get up.” So I said, “All right then.”
So they got hold of me, I said, “You’ll have to give me a hand then, because I can’t get up.” So I think the each gave me a hand and as I stood up, I just remember fainting. Just crashing back down and then the next thing I remember is, the emergency buzzer going off and tons of people were then in the room. I came round to get… and it was weird actually. Because, because I was a social worker at the hospital I’d seen one of the doctors on rotation at my hospital. So she walked in and I said, “Oh hi,” [laughs]. Funny the things you remember.
And they just started doing things to do me, they put a drip in my hand, and did whatever they needed to do. I just felt so poorly. And it turned out I’d lost four pints, which they term as a massive haemorrhage its, 2 - 2,000 mls which is very significant. So but they sorted me out and stabilised me and it was fine. As I was on the floor I remember looking up and seeing [husband]. Just, he was just standing there with [daughter], and he’d took his tee-shirt off, he had skin to skin contact and he was just stood here, just looking shocked. Just holding her.
I said to him later, “What was it like for you?” And he just said, “I thought I was watching you die.” And that was just running through my head. Just what am I going to do? I’ve got my daughter, I’ve got my lovely daughter. And my wife’s dying in front of me. What am I going to do?
Anyway when I came round I was just saying to him, “I’m fine. I’m fine. It’s fine.” But he didn’t believe me.
So they got me on the bed and sorted me out and put the drip up, they put fluids up and everything else and I was sorted, but at that time, I had what was it, I’d had a long time in labour. I’d been in labour hours and you know, I’d been up, I’d not slept that well, this was getting on to. She was born about 6 o’clock in the evening and by the time they’d sorted me out and gave her back to me it was 11 o’clock.
My Mum and Dad knew that something